For many people emotional balance often refers to staying in some sort of emotional middle ground.  This is not what I mean by emotional balance. I am referring to more of an emotional yin and yang where for each emotion there is an antithesis. Many people want to feel the positive emotions and ignore their ugly counterpart, but this is impossible, though we may try.  I see this most often when people experience grief or sadness after the loss of a loved one. My usual response is that grief and sadness after a loss is a reflection of the love and connection that is now changed or gone.

We tend to talk about LOVE vs. HATE and I suppose they can be seen as opposites in terms of an external expression of emotion that is directed toward someone or something.  But when you shift to the internal emotional experience is grief not what is felt in response to the loss of love?

So if grief is the yang to love’s yin then what provides the balance to hate?

I had to think about this one, but again if you focus on the internal experience of the emotion, then the opposite of hate is relief.  If hate is present and then removed what does one feel? I for one feel a sense of relief/peace, a weight lifted, a space regained.

Some people try to avoid the pain of grief and loss but in doing so they also avoid love.  Others equate letting go of hate with forgiveness (I will write more on forgiveness as an internal process) which is unthinkable to them so then they are entangled in their hatred and they never feel inner peace.

This did not start as an exposition on Love and Hate.  While I have conceived of the Yin and Yang of emotions for quite a while, I was inspired to write about it when I was nearly struck  down by disappointment. I thought “If the pain of this disappointment is so great then what exists at the other end of the pendulum swing?”  

It was HOPE.

The depth of my disappointment was directly proportional to the hope that I was holding for weeks before.  Disappointment hurts but it sure was nice to feel hopeful for a while. It is my hope for you that this inspires you to be curious about your emotions…